fresh air

It feels good to stop holding my breath and just breathe :)

Happy Endings

     I've been addicted to happy endings lately.  Chick flicks and chick lit, anything that immerses me in a world where love is true and lasting.  Where the girl gets the guy even after some crazy misunderstanding, an intial repulsion or extraneous circumstances.  Love conquers all.  Nothing stops it...not other people, not bad situations, not even fear. 
     I've gotten to the point where once I get to the part where the guy and girl are having problems and it seems like love can't overcome all this, that something is about to prove too much, I skip to the end.  It's almost a necessity, a complusion, I have to do it.  I can't just be content knowing that yes I chose this movie/book because they all have happy endings.  I can't wait the hour or so it takes to reach the conclusion complete with sweet words and heart-pounding kisses.  I must, must be assured of their love. 
     This simple habit has provided so much insight into how my brain is currently working.  More than anything I want to skip ahead a couple chapters to make sure that yes, I too will get that happy ending someday.  In allowing God to write my love story I've also learned that I must trust.  I can trust because I know Christ's character; I know He is good and faithful and loving.  It's proven to be nearly impossible but little by little I'm starting to believe that I'll be okay.